Birthday

I got a year older this weekend ! 

I can’t believe how fast this year has gone by… Only a year ago I was in Mallorca for my birthday with my thesis group, working on one of the biggest projects of my life and having one of the best experiences of my life. Now Im on the other side of the world, in a new amazing city, that has become my hometown and where I have made new incredible friends that made my birthday special and unforgettable. 

My birthday was a saturday this year so I sort of got to celebrate all the weekend :) and I was totally spoiled by everyone !

On friday I celebrated with my adoptive family, the Alvos. I went over for shabat and at the same time we celebrated my birthday. I got such nice presents from them and I even got a cake with candles and they sang happy birthday. I had such a lovely evening with them, they really do feel like family and they make me feel like part of it too. I am really grateful of having them in my life. 

After shabat on friday I got to celebrate into my birthday with my boyfriend and some of his friends and we ended up going to sleep at like 5.30 so it was a good start to my birthday. 

Saturday morning was a busy skype morning. First with my parents, then my uncle, Laura and little baby Lara looking as cute as every and then nonna and nonno. This year it’s the first time in my life that I celebrate my birthday without any member of my family present. All my previous birthday I have celebrate with either my parents, brother, uncle or grandparents. This time round it has the first time I only got to see them though skype. 

On saturday I was invited for lunch to Gonzalo’s families house and I got my second cake with candles and happy birthday sang to me. They spoiled me too ! For the rest of the day I slept and just chilled, trying to regain energy for the night. 

On saturday night it was time to celebrate with all my new friends in Chile. We went to a bar called Teclados. Many of my friends managed to come over and I got to celebrate with them my birthday. I had a great time and it was nice seeing how many new friends I have in my life since my last birthday. It made me happy seeing how many people were there to celebrate my birthday with me and it’s so nice to have all your friends in the same place. 

I had an incredible time ! 

I want to thank everyone that sent me birthday wished on facebook, that called me or sent me an e mail. Thank you all for making me feel loved. 

I also want to thank all the people that were there to celebrate my birthday, that spoiled me and made me feel so loved and special. It was a great, great birthday :) :) :) 

One more step into the culture

Today I lived a new experience in Santiago, something that allowed me to first fight one of my fears and second get to know the city and the people of my new country better.

My photography lesson today was in the center of Santiago in Paseo Ahumada. We had a field day instead of being in a boring classroom, it sounded very fun and different. BUT I freaked out when our teacher told us that our assignment for the day was to walk around with a white cardboard and our camera and ask people to take a portrait of them (Why the white cardboard?! To use as out background). 

Me talking to random strangers and asking them to take a picture of them ? 

mmhhh SO NOT WHO I AM !!! 

Luckily the other girl in my group is really open and wasn’t shy at all to ask everyone she saw if we could take a picture of them. And you know what surprised me the most ?! That from the 25 people we asked only 3 said no. Im so not used to this kind of kindness and easiness at helping others. In Milan if I would have asked anyone to take a picture of them they would have ran as fast as they could the other direction. 

Seeing that people where so kind and friendly I lost my fear to ask too and I even started chatting to the people we took the photo too and got to know them better. I was fun, I laughed a lot and got to know a lot of different people.  

The center of Santiago is so full of life, so full of diverse people and a lively atmosphere. I most admit that the little posh girl I am I don’t go much to that area because it’s not the safest, but still I should start wondering more the street of my new home town and not only  stay in my safe zone and my fancy area. 

It so nice to discover this new sides of Santiago and from chilean people. And there is sitll no much to discover … 

NOT EVERYTHING THAT SHINES IS GOLD.

Can someone tell me how I distinguish real gold from something that just is shiny ? 

I seem to be so good at picking up that shiny object and be sure that it’s gold. I keep it very close to me, I show it off to everyone, I tell them how lucky I am cause I found this little piece of gold and it’s all mine. I am convinced that this time I found it really, that I really found a piece of gold and that it’s for me, that I deserve it now. From that day on I walk around with a big, big smile and nothing can bring me down, I feel at the top of the world because of my little piece of gold. 

But then one day I look a little closer to my little piece of gold and I realize a bit of the gold has chipped off. But I dismiss it, nothing to worry about just a tiny bit of it has chipped off, after all nothing is perfect, it has to have it’s little defect, that way it is more special. 

As the days go by always more pieces of gold start to chip off, until one day Im only left with a rock in my hand. Once again I have been fooled, once again I have been played with, once again I am hurt. What I once thought was mine, I realize it never really was. It wasn’t gold after all, it just was a rock that had disguised itself with a gold coating to be all shiny and nice, so to get my attention and once it had it just play around with my happiness and my stability. 

Now Im left with a rock, a broken heart and disappointed. Not what I had expected. 

Now what ? Am I suppose to go out there and look for a new piece of gold ? Hope that some day I will really find a piece of gold and not just a shiny rock ? Or should I just stay away from everything that shines ? Should I just give up and keep my rocks as reminder of what I have gone through as not to repeat it any more ? 

I don’t know what the right answer is or what I should do. What I can say is that I have learned that not everything is what it appears to be at first, not everything that shines is gold.  

Stop and think

Once in a while we have to stop and think things over. Observe our surrounding, understand how the changes that have happened around us affects our life and our stability and how we have to change to adapt to the changes.

It’s so important to take a moment for yourself and really think things over, it’s the only way we can truly understand how we really feel and how we are doing. But with the life style we have now a days we always have less of that meditation moments, we are so busy doing so many things we forget about ourselves.    

Don’t ever forget yourself! You have to take care of yourselves as much as you take care of others and sometimes we neglect that and just forget it. 

If you forget to take care of yourself and you don’t listen to your body, heart and mind you will get to a point were things will get bad and the solution to your issues will be harder than if you would have observed and stopped an thought about everything before that.

Recognize the signs when they start manifesting and don’t let them get worse. React straight away and find the solution before it gets too bad. 

If you don’t like your job, quite and find a better one, if you don’t like what you are studying, change or find a way to survive the time left you have in uni, if you don’t like the country you are living in, pack your bags and leave, … just don’t keep that bad feeling inside, it will slowly start eating you up and take away all your shine and happiness. 

I for example have realized that I was going back to an old pattern of mine that I had learned to get away from and deal with, and because I haven’t been paying attention to how I was really doing I was falling right back to it, now i have realized and I can once again take hold of the situation and find the way out of this bad habit of mine. From now on I won’t let the world take hold of me like that without me being in control and realizing what exactly is going on inside of me. 

So every single one of us needs to stop and think once in a while. Take a morning or an afternoon for YOU and just YOU, don’t do anything in particular and just look back to how you have been going and see if you really are at peace and happy with yourself and if you aren’t 100% there, then fight hard to get to it. 

Mummy

It was mother’s day yesterday a special day to celebrate all the great mothers out there but really it should be mother’s day and father’s day everyday. How much do the do for us ? I think only one day a year to celebrate all they do for us isn’t enough !!!!! I at least know for sure that only one day to celebrate my amazing mother isn’t enough at all. 

I love my mother more than anything in this world, I love the relationship I have with here, I love the person she is and I admire her so much, I hope that some day I can at least be half the amazing woman she is. 

I am thankful for her love, her compassion, her trust, her wise words, her protective arms, for always and I mean ALWAYS being there for me ! She is my friend, I can talk to her about anything without being judged or frowned upon. She lets me cry my eyes out to her and then she knows exactly what to say to make me feel better, to make me feel loved and cared for. 

At times I feel so alone without her by my side, I really am grateful for skype, that way I can talk to her often and at least feel a tinny bit closer to her. 

All I really want to say is that I love my mum, Im so happy I have her as my mum, friend and confident, I am proud of being her daughter.